How to Convince Your Parents for Your Inter-Caste Marriage

Getting married to the love of your life is a great feeling, but if your parents are against your decision in that case what will you do? In India, most of the people believe and support arranged marriage and they strongly oppose the concept of love marriage. People in India believe that a relationship is something that should be negotiated between two families of the same caste. But, it is not always possible that you will find someone whom you love within your community. People still accept the love marriage within the community, but an inter-caste marriage is total taboo in India. With the changing trends and changed lifestyle more and more people are finding their love outside their caste. In that situation when you know the whole world will be against your decision, what will you do to convince your parents? The most important thing in inter-caste marriage is you should strongly believe in your decision. Before telling this to your parents, you should be well prepared about all type of questions and negative remarks as well. Once you review or thought about answers for all possible questions or concerns your parents might have and find out the possible answers, you can easily counter argument for each.

First Discuss This With Some Close Family Friend Or Relative: If you are really serious about your relationship and you want to marry him/her then first discuss about your relationship to someone close to your parents and family. It may be your younger or elder brother or sister, uncle, grandparents, uncle, aunty or friend of you father or mother. So, first of all observe your family members and find out that supporter. Once you find that person and sure about that you can share your secret and he/she will help you out in this matter, then without delay share about your relationship. That person can play a very crucial role in convincing your parents as per your needs. 

Start Giving Direct And Indirect Hints:  Once you identify the right person to share your secretive relation then take the next step by giving direct or indirect hints to your parents. This is the second and most important move. Start giving hints to your parents about your relationship. You can tell them that now you are ready for marriage. You can make them understand what exactly you are feeling and what are your expectations? You should also tell them why you are in favor of love marriage and that you are not very much convinced with arranged marriage. You should tell your opinion to your parents. If your parents are not that liberal in that case start giving them some clues about your relationship so that when you actually tell them about your relationship they will not be in a shocking situation.  

Introduce Your Parents To Your Partner At Some Public Gathering: This is another bold and important step you should take to make your parents aware about your relationship. It will help them to realize that there is someone in your life and you really want to marry him/her. Before fixing their meeting, it is always better that you tell your parents about your girlfriend/boyfriend in advance. Tell them about his/her family background, education and other important information to create a good image. 

Start Indicating That He/She Is Not Just A ‘Good Friend’:  Once you introduce your parents, intentionally do some things that can grab their attention and make them understand that the girl/boy holds a special place in your life. They should get this message that there is something serious between you two. Don’t miss a single chance to tell your parents about his/her qualities and family background and other important things. Take advantage of the situation and don’t hesitate to tell your parents about the values and positive things about your partner. 

Find The Right Time To Tell Them Upfront: There are chances that after your indirect hints and disclosure your parents might ask you about this relationship. But, if that doesn’t happen then find the right time and appropriate time to tell your parents about your relationship. Think about a time when your parents are in good mood and listen to you calmly. It is even better if you ask the person to whom you have already discussed about your relationship to come at your home when you disclose this. It is better to keep your support with you at the time of conversation. 

Stay Firm To Your Decision: If you have any doubt about your relationship or about the future of your relationship then take some more time to evaluate the things. But, if you are 100% sure about your relationship and its future, then talk to your parents and tell them about your decision. Get ready to listen to a lot of negative and not so good things about inter-caste love marriages such as different religion, traditions and culture, their family values and even the smallest things which you generally ignore like eating habits, lifestyle and dressing styles, etc. 

Try To Keep Your Parents Away From Those People Who Are Against Inter-Caste Marriage: If there is any family member, friend or relatives who are against the love marriage in that case you should keep your parents away from them as they might create problem. So, it is really important that you declare about your relationship to your parents at right time and especially when they are in good mood. This is really a serious and sensitive matter, so you should not take any chance while making the formal declaration.

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